In Die Nacht Für Immer
There is no pulse, his hands are cold, his eyes remain shut and he looks pale. It's clear to say that Bill is dead! I stand up and freeze on my spot while staring at my bestie, Bill who has no pulse left on him. He is now a corpse! No longer a human! I take some time to feed that fact into my mind. " How could this happen? " Flashback, I remember exactly what Bill have said to me, yesterday. Maybe he was right after all. " Was it Tom who take him last night? That is why Bill was all ready to go. He knows that he'll leave this world to join Tom?!?! "
These thoughts are raining in my mind.
Feeling a little bit confused and still in shock. I set my eyes on the side table where there is an envelope written "ELLE" on it. I immediately reach for it to read the contents inside.
Let me guess, you're here in my room right now on this lovely morning just to wish me " Happy Birthday " right? See, I'm right. Aren't I? Well, danke Elle but I am very sorry that I am not be able to hear you say it out loud in front of me. I owe you a big hug, my dearest bestie! Elle, As much as I don't want to believe that Tom's gonna take me on the eve of our 21st birthday, well..I tried and I can't! Because I believe, he will eventually come for me and that is why I'm writing this letter to you. Tom may not come here in the real world but for sure he'll come in my dream. As I told you before, Tom always come and visits me there ever since he's gone. So, I'm all set for him to take me, forever into the night. Tom has made me a promise that I could never forget.
I hope you will understand all of this, Elle. It's not like I'm begging to God to take me so that I'll be together with Tom again. It's just that..I kinda feel when the date is set to 1st September, it will be my time to leave this world. I know this might sounds weird but we'll just see how it goes. If you read this, well you know what it means then. Anyways, I wanna say sorry and thanks for everything that you've done for me and Tom, Elle. We couldn't be thankful to have such a wonderful bestie like you. Vielen herzlichen dank! As the token of our appreciation , I would like you to have all of our songs. There are all yours! Keep them or maybe you could promote them for us since we ran out of time. So, we don't have a chance to do so. It's up to you. Although, as for ' In Die Nacht ' since it is a special one, I want you to keep it only to yourself. Play it every time if you feel like you need or want us by your side, bitte. We promise that we'll always be there for you, no matter what! Let ' In Die Nacht ' be the song to remind you of us. And I'll be very happy if you hear it over and over again while thinking all the precious memories that we shared before.
Til Then, Elle. I'm gonna miss you! Like a lot! And oh yeah, send my love to my family especially to my mom who has been working hard planning on making that special birthday breakfast for me. Haha..busted! I knew it all cause I overheard about it the other day. Sorry mom! Tell her that... Well, you know it's hard for me to say goodbye to you, Elle. Especially in this way. Again, I apologize that I had to, even if it's hard. Tom is waiting for my freedom to be up there with him. All I can say that there's no other perfect place for Bill Kaulitz other than next to the one and only Tom Kaulitz. Take care, Elle. Ich Liebe Dich! Muah! Remember, the Kaulitz twins für Immer!
P/S: I bet you must be drowning yourself in tears as soon as you've finished reading this letter. It's okay, keep on crying. I won't get mad. I would do the same thing if I were in your shoes. Just to let you know, my tissue box is right under the bed if you need it. Hehe..
" Oh Bill! " I laugh a little while tears filling my eyes. So it is true, then. Tom did take Bill with him, last night. I mean, there are no sign showing that Bill has committed suicide, no knife, pills or whatever things which can lead to his death. To my surprise, Bill died beautifully in his sleep when he met Tom in his dream. I can tell by just looking at his smile. He left a smile which he usually shows when Tom is around.
So, here I am standing in the middle of his room and can't hold back my tears thinking of the kaulitz twins. Moreover, ' In Die Nacht ' is all I can hear since it is still playing at the scene which makes me even more miserable. From this moment on, I have to accept the fact that the air of the Kaulitz twins is no longer exist on the surface of the Earth. They're either gone or flew away to a better sacred place called heaven. Miraculously, Tom and Bill are meant to be together! They have never been so apart from each other for a long time even when it comes to death, because even God knows how much they need to be side by side and how strong their love for one another.
I believe with all my heart that the Kaulitz twins will always and forever be together into the night.